Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
