I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
