can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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