your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I'm like, not good at living.
Randomize
