My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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