Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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