Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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