he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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