I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
