haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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