she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
