I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
