is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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