I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
