Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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