you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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