Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
