why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
