IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Randomize
