Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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