Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I didn't notice because vodka
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Randomize