I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Randomize
