Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
