we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
