My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
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