it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
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