He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
