can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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