So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
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