I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
