ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize