he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
