Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
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