I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
