Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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