Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
