is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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