is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
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