I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
