They should really pass out barf bags in church
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
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