I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
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