Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
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