we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I think i peed on brittanys purse
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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