Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
