I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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