I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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