i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
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