Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
