i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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