I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
