Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
